Mad Darby Diaries

I always pride myself on unpacking an entire house in one day, two at the most, and I kept to that tradition.  Unpacking wasn't the problem.  I was in control of that.  What I couldn't control was the incompetence of Orange, who still haven't done the job, leaving me with Wi-Fi only working in one room, a house phone that doesn't work in the living room, no television and a service (if you can call it that) which keeps you hanging on for hours.  I  also discovered that in this 300 year old apartment the electrics are not much newer.  Sockets are sparse and ancient, and the lighting is more or less non existent.  However, nowhere is perfect and it is so good to be able to walk everywhere or ride the bike. The plumber came to plumb in the dishwasher and washing machine, although first of all he had to create plumbing.  He and I stood and stared at the dishwasher, which was clearly too big for the space.  He was muttering a lot and was determine...

Today I will sign the papers for the apartment.  To accommodate the sellers the appointment with the notaire is not until 5pm so, although I pay the money and get the keys, nothing much more will happen.  The French have a way of stripping a house on their departure so will I find a light bulb in situ, a door hook or a toilet roll holder?  We will see.  l left all the light bulbs and the light fittings, toilet roll holders, complete with toilet rolls, hooks on all the bedroom doors and numerous other little helpful things. I went to the hospital the other day to see the geneticist.  She was a cheery soul.  She proposed that in order to avoid another bout of cancer I should have various things removed as a preventative measure.  I was explaining to  a friend who said, 'well at least you would be alive.'  Yes but without half my body parts, and what happens to all those empty spaces inside let alone adding the bits to replace the missing parts ...

The internet broke down where I am staying and, unfortunately, mobiles don't have any coverage either so for 3 days life has been difficult.  The notaire sent me papers that I couldn't get access to, nor the ones that Orange sent.   I went to Angers to get a bank cheque and was told it would take 2 days.  Why?  My son's account went down to zero and I couldn't transfer any money to it, and missing orders from Waterstone's to my son and grandson went unnoticed. All that disruption, and I am just one person.  A major attack on the system could bring the world to a standstill.  Some  have already tried and succeeded, at least to selected organisations. I enjoyed a lovely dinner in a restaurant on Tuesday before heading to the cinema to see James Bond.  It took me a long time to find a restaurant that actually served food before 7pm.  Even the Chinese restaurant, which is in spitting distance of the cinema, doesn't open before 7pm.  I d...

I finally  move in just over a week.   I have bought a television, although I am not sure what I will  be able to watch on it, and I have bought an electric hob to replace the gas presently in situ.  When I was 7 years old I was blown up in a gas explosion and I am still very wary of gas.  In fact I have never had gas central heating until now so that will be a new experience.  In Sudan I had bottled gas, which sat in the kitchen next to the cooker.  I decided to get someone to make a hole in the wall so that the gas bottle could sit outside in the courtyard.  Of course, that night someone came over the wall and stole the gas bottle.  So then I had a  cage built, the same as the one I had had constructed for the drums of fuel  for the generator.  That seemed to put the kybosh on our silent thieves stealing the gas and fuel but of course they still slid over the wall at night looking for other goodies.  My car, which w...

I am still walking around in shirts rather than sweaters, even though the days are getting shorter, the days gloomier and the temperatures lower.  I have three weeks to go until I move into the apartment,  just in time to turn the heating on and, according to reports, pay extortionate gas bills.  This is the first time I shall have had gas central heating and I am not over the moon about it.  Still, I would rather be here than in the UK where the problems are mounting - long delays in medical treatment, shortage of truck drivers and manpower.  'It's not the fault of Brexit,' I hear the 'leavers' cry, 'it's the pandemic.'  Obviously the pandemic hasn't helped but of course Brexit has largely contributed to the problems. A friend on the Isle of Wight has posted a picture of the White Hart pub with a notice on a blackboard outside, saying 'beer shortage coming soon, panic buy here.'  Don't you just love the British sense of humour?  That is ...

There are so many things to do when buying a property, electric, gas, water, insurance and so it goes on.  Doing everything in a foreign language is challenging but add to that the dreaded masks and it is a miracle I can understand anything.  This morning I went in search of house insurance.  It took precisely 30 seconds for the agent to remove her mask and for me to think, 'thank goodness', now I can understand what she is saying.  She asked me whether I had anything that was worth more than 400€ and was less than ten years old.   I thought about this and came to the conclusion that after a fairly long life I don't own anything of value, not monetary anyway.  She then recommended that I add specific robbery from the house.  Isn't that a contradiction in terms, after all I had just admitted that I owned nothing of value so what exactly would they steal that I would miss?  After all  they are hardly likely to want my photograph albums, or...

 Somewhere in the world there is a country holding a national election but in the states they are in the midst of election fever on a permanent basis.  Biden became President at the end of January yet 7 months later the main topic of conversation across the pond is the mid-term elections in 2022 and whether Trump will run in 2024.  I can understand the anxiety on both sides with the senate and congress so closely divided but wouldn't it be refreshing if all these well paid politicians would get some work done in the meantime?  Individual states are passing ridiculous laws restricting voting rights, relaxing gun laws, banning abortion and interfering in sensible rules on covid restrictions while the federal government sits on its hands doing nothing but hurling insults and talking about the next elections.  Give us a break. Meanwhile in France all sorts of people are jumping into the presidential race.  Will France finally vote for a woman?  I am not ho...