I always pride myself on unpacking an entire house in one day, two at the most, and I kept to that tradition. Unpacking wasn't the problem. I was in control of that. What I couldn't control was the incompetence of Orange, who still haven't done the job, leaving me with Wi-Fi only working in one room, a house phone that doesn't work in the living room, no television and a service (if you can call it that) which keeps you hanging on for hours. I also discovered that in this 300 year old apartment the electrics are not much newer. Sockets are sparse and ancient, and the lighting is more or less non existent. However, nowhere is perfect and it is so good to be able to walk everywhere or ride the bike.
The plumber came to plumb in the dishwasher and washing machine, although first of all he had to create plumbing. He and I stood and stared at the dishwasher, which was clearly too big for the space. He was muttering a lot and was determined to get it to fit in so I left him to it and went on with my unpacking. Half an hour later I went downstairs to see how he was getting on. His face was one of horror. 'We have a big problem, a very big problem,' he said, a royal 'we' I assumed. 'How big a problem?' I asked looking round and wondering why the dishwasher had completely disappeared. He stretched his arms wide and said, 'A very, very, very big problem,' before leading me outside. There, sitting forlornly in the communal courtyard was what was left of the dishwasher. It looked as though someone had taken a hatchet to it. I looked back at his face, similar to the ones my sons had when they had broken a window or worse, and I burst out laughing. I didn't know how he had made such a spectacular mess, nor how he had carried it down the steps all on his own, but the situation was so ludicrous all I could see was the funny side of it. He said, 'you are not angry?' 'Look, this year I have had cancer, moved house, lost my niece to cancer; it is a dishwasher after all.' He insisted I jump in his van and go directly to a shop to buy a new one, which I paid for and hopefully I will get reimbursed on the bill. Every time I think about his face and the sight of his destruction I smile.
Yesterday I put the washing machine on and flooded the floor. Last evening, the lamp shade fell on my head and during the night one of the blinds just fell off the bedroom window, fittings and all. I may have to start wearing nightclothes.
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