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Passport control

On Tuesday I was on my way back to the UK to do babysitting duty.  At 6.00pm French time,  I went to the cafe on the ferry to get a cup of tea.  I was travelling on the 'no frills' route, which means cheaper and no posh restaurant or cinema.    There was a long queue in the cafe so I went to the bar to buy the tea, returning to the cafe to drink it.  The queue was even longer and hadn't seemed to have moved.  The cross channel ferries have mainly British people travelling on them and the British like to eat dinner early in the evening but Brittany Ferries is a French company and  the French like to eat their main meal at lunchtime.  But hang the customers, it is the French workers that must take priority.  Hence the notice on the counter saying ''no hot food between 6.00pm and 7.00pm'' French time.  Sorry Brits keep your screaming, hungry kids quiet for an hour.

When I got to passport control in Portsmouth, the official looked inside my car at the empty seats and asked, 'Are you travelling alone?'  I nearly said no I am travelling with a giant imaginary pink rabbit, but one must be polite to officials or they might not let you in so I looked pointedly at the empty seats and simply said 'yes'.  Then he asked  'Do you know which port you have just travelled from?'  I stared at him looking for a hint of humour in the question but no, he was serious.  Are they testing for senile dementia at points of entry now?

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